


Strange New Impossible Lands

by Lieju



Category: Disney Duck Universe, Disney Ducks (Comics), duck comics - Fandom
Genre: Gen, donald duck is a busy busy man, doubleduck - Freeform, lot of short cameos - Freeform, paperinik - Freeform, tamers of nonhuman threats, x mickey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:09:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21955672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lieju/pseuds/Lieju
Summary: My Duck Comics Secret Santa2019 Gift for someone who wanted Tamers of Nonhuman Threats and X-Mickey crossover and some stuff about Donald’s different identities.
Relationships: Donald Duck & Mickey Mouse
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	Strange New Impossible Lands

Donald had been in a bad mood ever since he woke up, and hearing the voice of the person he hadn't really thought of in years really didn't make his trip to the grocery store any better.

”Donald! Hey, it _is_ you!”

Donald turned towards the mouse. ”Hey. It is you.”

He shuffled in place a bit, awkwardly regretting the blatant unenthusiasm in his tone. ”So. Long time no see.”

”Yeah.” Mickey nodded.

An awkward silence fell.

”We should do lunch sometime,” Mickey said. ”To catch up.”

Before Donald could reply he continued: ”Why not right now, actually?” He looked at his watch. ”I'm free. Do you have anything?”

Donald did not. He was, as one might say, between jobs at the moment.

But telling Mickey that...

He paid attention to the mouse's suit. It wasn't expensive, nothing that made it look like he was trying to overcompensate, or that he was throwing money away.

It was neat, well put together. Paired with a nice watch that implied he had a bit of an extra money to get himself something nice. Not too expensive. Then again, Donald's idea of expensive was 'I could not justify spending money on this when there are three sets of school supplies to buy'

The mouse had always radiated self-confidence and had this annoying successful aura to him...

 _He is probably doing well,_ Donald thought bitterly.

Out loud he said: ”Sorry, I'm really really busy now.”

He couldn't help adding: ”An important career... thing. A thing. Yeah. I got opportunities. Bye.”

* * *

Donald woke up to an alarm.

He struggled up. ”Not now Uncle Scroo-”

Wait.

That sound was his TNT alarm.

He pulled it out of his closet. It had been a long time. He even sometimes forgot he had this gig. His life was so full of being The Duck Avenger, and Doubleduck, and Scrooge's slave, and a parent-

But this job had a big difference compared to all of those.

It paid.

And it paid well.

Donald saluted the image on screen. ”What's up I'm awake!”

* * *

In half an hour Donald had dragged Fethry out of bed, shaken him awake with a ”The world needs us!” and gotten him into the TNT headquarters for briefing.

”Welcome, Agents,” The Head started. ”We have measured outstanding levels of extradimensional portal radiation somewhere around or near Duckburg.” He pointed at the image on screen. ”We have reason to believe this person is involved-”

”I just ran into him!” Donald pointed at the screen at the file image of Mickey Mouse. ”Now that you mention it he was maybe acting a bit odd.”

”I'm sure it's fine,” Fethry said. ”And what do you mean portal radiation anyway? It's all fine...”

”Really?” Katrina Kolik said, ignoring Fethry and focusing her attention on Donald. ”Maybe it'd be for the best if you tried to dig up some more information.”

Donald saluted. This sounded like an easy job.

”Okay,” he said.

It might even be nice, seeing an old friend and reminiscing a bit.

* * *

Donald smiled at the mouse sitting in front of him in the small cafe. ”So, it's nice to meet up like this-” He took a sip from his latte. He wasn't sure why he had suggested an overpriced coffee shop.

It had felt like something Mickey would fit in, he supposed.

”And so lately I have been doing more work at the paper, writing a column on bee-keeping,” Mickey said. ”Of course I keep being pulled back in but at the moment I really would prefer a more stress-free life with everything going on. Maybe I will return to being a police consultant at some point.”

”A-ha.” Donald lifted his drink to his beak and pretended to drink. The cup was tiny and he was dreading the bill already. He had to make this one cup last for as long as possible.

”I remember you being a reporter too?” Mickey asked.

”Not in a while,” Donald sighed. ”Uncle Scrooge outsourced his clickbait journalism to some trained ferrets. I was shining coins for him but-”

He hesitated. He had fallen asleep at the job after a hard night's work patrolling the city as the Duck Avenger. A row had happened. Donald couldn't remember if he had been once more sacked or if he had quit. Not that it mattered. He'd grovel back there at some point anyway.

Not that Mickey would have to know any of that.

”I had other opportunities, so I quit.”

That was basically true anyway. His work as the Duck Avenger took a lot out of him and without having to get up for work he had been putting even more hours in crime fighting.

Mickey leaned in. ”An exciting job?”

”Nothing big,” Donald said. ”I can't talk about it much. Because uh- I still don't know if it will actually happen.”

But he seemed a bit... Impressed.

Donald smiled, feeling a bit better.

_Now then-_

”So, I don't know how much I should be talking about this gig I got,” Donald said. ”I had to sign a non disclosure agreement. It's big.”

He had technically signed a contract for TNT. Or less signed anything and more had his biometric data scanner into the system with the implication that if he let anything slip the Organization would 'deal with him' presumably in a way that'd include being teleported into space.

”Say no more. I get it.”

Donald frowned, hoping Mickey would have been a bit more curious and tried to dig up more information out of him. Probably he didn't think it was actually anything cool. Nothing that could measure up to _his_ interesting life.

”Yeah it must be pretty important job you do. With the police and stuff,” Donald said.

”Like I said, not in a while. I'm taking it easy now. Anyway, I'm good at keeping secrets, so if you want to talk-”

Donald was just trying to think how to approach the subject or try to find out anything when he was interrupted.

”Hello!” Fethry popped up from behind a potted plant and patted Donald's shoulder. ”Here you are, my dear colleague. Have you taken a good look at the charts?”

Donald stared at Fethry. And the obviously fake beard he was wearing.

Fethry winked.

”No,” Donald told him. ”Anyway I was bu-”

Fethry pulled up a chair and joined the two. ”Say no more, pardner!”

He winked at Donald again, batting his eyelashes at him. Donald glared.

”Nice to meet you...” Mickey said.

”Doctor... George.” Fethry shook his hand. ”I'm Donald's colleague. Nice ta meet ya'll mah dude.”

So now he was also doing an accent of some kind. Great.

”Yes and I'm sure Mister George is very busy!” Donald said.

”Nono, not at all.”

”So?” Mickey asked. ”Is this Doctor George from your new job?”

Donald got up.

”Yes. And he was just leaving.” Deciding Fethry would not take the clue he took his arm. ”In fact _we_ are leaving.”

* * *

”What was that about?” Donald asked.

”I thought I'd help you,” Fethry said. ”To sneakily get information out of him. I once saw this documentary on interrogation. The trick is to spot things called 'micro expressions'”

He poked Donald's bill.

”For example right now your macro-expressions are saying 'I am angry' but your micro expressions are saying 'wow cool.”

”And tell me, is being dressed as a hobo santa part of the process?”

”I told you what I was doing! I was getting a whole bad cop good cop thing going on!”

”You told me? When?”

Fethry looked at him like he was pulling his leg. ”Just now. Come on I used Morse code.”

He winked again. ”See? Come on now Don, we have a system. I think I explained it to you.”

”You were... blinking Morse code at me..?”

Fethry patted his back. ”I knew you'd catch on! Eventually. It's great this connection we have. Almost makes it okay I have to keep quiet about the secret mission Katrina Kolik gave m-”

He slapped his hand over his mouth.

Donald gave him a glare. ”A what?”

Fethry fidgeted. ”Nothing!”

Donald took hold of his shoulders and shook him. ”What did she give you? Some assignment I'm not part of?”

Fethry glanced around. He leaned in conspiratorially.

”Top Secret.”

”Fethry...”

Donald crossed his arms.

”Okay so. Remember when we were kids and we used to climb this tree and that one time you threw my favourite hat on the roof?”

Fethry looked at Donald expectantly.

Donald stared at him. ”I have no idea what you are talking about.”

A relieved smile spread on Fethry's face. ”That was a test! I had to test it was really you. Of course you never threw my hat onto the roof you wouldn't be mean like that-”

”Fethry I am losing my patience here!”

Fethry looked around and slapped his fake moustache on Donald.

”Here, wear this just in case as I explain. So, the TNT organization maybe thought, just a bit, that you might have been replaced with a clone or be unreliable for some other reason.”

”What?”

”Shhh!” Fethry shushed him. ”Apparently Mickey got involved in something weird. And not just him. Someone else you know-”

”Who?”

”The Duck Avenger.”

* * *

Donald never had done something like this before.

He was very good at compartmentalization. He just had to.

He was Donald Duck.

A single parent, minimum wage worker, the nephew of the world's richest man, a boyfriend, a rockstar, a reporter, a Caballero, a superhero, a tamer of nonhuman threats...

And the top agent of The Agency.

He usually did his best to keep all of the different facets of his life far apart.

But TNT was looking into the Duck Avenger and Donald Duck's connection with him.

Boundaries were starting to break.

He had to know what was going on.

So Donald locked himself into his closet and pulled out his Agent Phone. The one he only ever took from its lock box for Agency missions.

The mechanical voice spoke out. ”Please identify yourself.”

Donald stood a bit straighter and spoke into the device, slipping into this role. ”Agent Doubleduck.”

”Scanning. Please hold still.”

After the face and fingerprint scan the phone opened.

”Welcome, Agent Doubleduck. Please state your inquiry.”

”I need to get into the TNT organization database.”

”Scanning. Please stand by.”

”Hurry up...”

Finally the files from the TNT mainframe were pulled up on the tiny screen.

”As we cannot be certain of the level of personal involvement Agent Duck has with Mr Mouse it is recommended Agent D.Duck is not informed of the details and instead is let to interact with Mr Mouse under supervision from Agent F.Duck while our other Agents track down the anomaly- I knew it!”

With shaking hands Donald clicked the folder.

He sighed in relief. Apparently they weren't aware he was the Duck Avenger. The document focused on his superhero persona as a separate entity.

And they weren't even all that interested in him as a person it seemed. Apart from a few cases where he had interacted with otherwordly threats TNT didn't seem to much consider the Duck Avenger. Not their jurisdiction.

Except-

The file mentioned _Fantomius_. It seemed TNT was very interested in the connection between the two.

Donald clicked on his file.

”Warning. Security level insufficient.”

Donald frowned.

Giving up on that he pulled up the details on the latest briefings instead.

_Contact 'M' has informed us about the possibility of a Level Omega threat._

Donald skipped the paragraph that got into the technical details he had no hope of understanding. It was big and spooky just like everything TNT dealt with (also apparently 'a dularescencent') . He skimmed over the report until something caught his eye.

_Fantomius's aka John Quackett's connection to the painting 'Land of the impossible' must be investigated further._

Land of the impossible... Donald had seen that phrase before-

“Doubleduck? What are you doing?”

Donald bit his bill. He had been careless.

The image of Kay K filled the screen of his phone. “You better have a good explanation for this.”

Donald looked her in the eye. “I do.”

“Is it Agency business?”

Donald had a feeling she already knew the answer. “No.”

“I should report you trying to use the Agency resources for personal reasons.”

Donald looked her in the eye. “You should. But I am asking you not to. This had nothing to do with the Agency.”

Kay examined his face. Eventually she nodded. “I'll pretend I didn't see anything. Be more careful this time, Agent Doubleduck.”

The image cut off. Donald sighed in relief.

A hand grasped his shoulder.

Donald let out a surprised quack before his secret agent instincts caught up with him and he pinned the other figure to the wall.

He stared at the intruder.

”Fethry?”

”Hey, you never told me you were a secret agent!” Fethry sounded hurt.

Donald let go.

”Sorry. I really need to go.”

”Well me too actually I'm still busy with things like distracting you-”

Fethry slammed his hands over his bill.

Donald sighed. ”TNT told you?”

Fethry shook his head. ”No but I can't tell you who. It's a secret.” He mimed zipping up his beak. ”I promised.”

Donald was about to call him out as a terrible liar. Of course it was TNT. But he wasn't too keen on bringing it up again when he himself had been caught up in a compromising position.

Deciding he could explain it away later as a job he had gotten from Uncle Scrooge, Donald pushed it away from his mind for now.

”It's okay. You stay here and keep up the good work of distracting me.”

Fethry gave him a look.

Donald smiled. ”I'll be fine.”

He opened the closet door. As he did so it only then occurred to him the door had been locked and somehow Fethry had gotten in anyway.

No time to think about that.

* * *

The Duck Avenger stared at the familiar ruined manor. Villa Rosa. It had been so long...

He shook his head. No time to dwell in nostalgia.

He jumped to the ruins. Once this mansion had belonged to the gentleman thief. Now it lay in ruin. (Thanks Gladstone)

The Duck Avenger had returned there for a few times. He had thought he had solved all of the mansion's mysteries.

He wasn't alone.

The Duck Avenger hid in the shadows as two TNT agents walked past.

One of them pulled out a scanner. “I lost the trace again. I don't think it's nearby.”

The other one examined a crumbling wall before kicking it. “Let's keep at it.”

The Duck Avenger frowned. They better not destroy the mansion any further.

He shook his head. At least it seemed like he was on the right track. TNT knew Fantomius had hidden something supernatural nearby and had decided to keep their Agent Donald out of it.

A smile played on his bill. Unlike those guys he had a pretty good idea where to actually look.

He returned to his car and pulled out his scanner. He should have done this sooner. Done a thorough search. Well, no time like the present.

He turned the scanner Gyro had made him on and watched as an image was drawn onto the screen.

If he remembered correctly, large parts of the mansion were hidden underground...

But those were pretty thoroughly searched. But if he had been Fantomius he would have had other hideouts nearby.

He pulled up the satellite image. He had come to Villa Rosa before but this time he had more information.

Remembering the 'Land of the Impossible' had been mentioned in Fantomius's diary he had re-read it. And yes, the last entry mentioned _Land of the Impossible_ , something Donald had previously assumed referred to maybe an another country John and Dolly had fled to once their situation had turned too dangerous in Duckburg.

But with the knowledge he now had it all made so much more sense.

The details mentioned in the last entry were not veiled references to their new home across the globe.

It was instructions for finding something much closer to Villa Rosa.

Duck Avenger moved swiftly through the night.

The mansion grounds had been searched both by him and uncle Scrooge in search of Fantomius's secrets (and treasures) before. Most of what Dolly and John had stolen had never resurfaced, and Duck Avenger knew there had been some other secret vault for stolen artwork. A hidden gallery. Both he and Scrooge had searched it before but had found nothing.

But if he was right the diary was pointing him towards the countryside surrounding the mansion.

Eventually he spotted an overgrown well and landed his car. He looked down. According to the scanner the well was surprisingly large. The Duck Avenger set his rope onto the ledge and started to descend into the darkness only lighted up by his belt-buckle lamp.

There was a sudden snap and he plummeted down-

And landed in a puddle.

He struggled to the dry land. He looked up, the night sky visible from the well. Had his rope cut off accidentally..?

He dried up his cape, surveying his environment. It seemed the bottom of the well was attached to a large room with a door on the other side.

He moved there and opened up the door.

And barely managed to avoid the net coming down.

Duck Avenger nudged the decrepit old net with his foot. Traps.

So he was on the right track.

He opened the door and gasped at the collection in front of him.

So this was where Fantomius had collected his loot. The paintings and statues were arranged in the vault- no, a private gallery.

So, where was the painting he was looking for?

When he saw it he knew immediately he had found it.

The Duck Avenger had never considered himself an art critic. If he saw a portrait that looked realistic it was Good Art as far a he was concerned.

But as he looked into the painting he felt... He supposed it was like seeing something for the first time.

The artwork was rough and definitely not realistic.

But the winding mountains and forests that were painted with merely the implication of a brush seemed so much like something more. Like it was a twisted mirror of the world itself. Even the colours on it seemed to shift in the light, as if alive.

He tore away his gaze and turned the frame around. On the back there was an envelope.

And in the envelope, a letter.

_To whom it may concern._

_I fear everything has its end and our adventures as the Phantom Thief and his dashing partner in crime are not different. Now after our identities have been leaked I fear it's best for us to go. So, we will put everything in order, leave my inheritance as Fantomius behind, and step into the new unexplored world._

_-John &Dolly_

The Duck Avenger examined the painting.

Had they really-

”Donald!”

The Duck Avenger turned to see Mickey.

”What are _you_ doing here?”

And how did he know?

Mickey took a step forward. ”You don't know how dangerous that thing is! Please quietly set it down-”

”Why would I?”

Duck Avenger suddenly had the strongest feeling he was being watched.

Swiftly moving the painting under his arm he pulled out his Freeze-gun and pointed it at the mouse.

”Did you come alone?”

Mickey hesitated.

”Please, Donald. That painting is a gateway to a different world, it has been active lately, and we don't know if-”

Duck Avenger could feel the energy radiating from the painting before he saw the portal open.

It was as if the reality itself shifted, the painted landscape stretching out until the chamber surrounding them was indistinguishable from the artwork.

”Donald!”

He was tackled into the dusty floor just before the insect-like leg could spear him.

Duck Avenger recovered fast, pushed Mickey away, and aimed his Freeze-gun.

But he hesitated. Would it work?

No time to wonder. He had to act before whatever that was could get through the painting. He pulled the trigger.

The creature did not freeze.

Instead it let out a screech that made both him and the mouse fall down.

Duck Avenger could see more of the spider-like monster emergence. It turned its hungry eyes to him.

”Hey! Over here!” someone called.

The gaze of the monster left the Duck Avenger and he took the chance to kick at the creature.

“Go for the eyes! It's a Shadowland Arachnobeast they don't like it when you poke them in the eye!”

The Duck Avenger acted fast and threw his Freeze-Gun at the eyes.

As it connected, the monster wailed.

It retreated back into the painting, reality bent back into the shape.

And then it was over.

Duck Avenger turned to the tall figure who had come to their aid.

A figure who seemed to be some kind of a hairy beast man.

Mickey lifted his hands up.

”So, I think everyone here owes someone an explanation.”

* * *

Mickey sat next to Donald. ”So.”

Donald nodded. ”So.” He finished putting away his Duck Avenger costume in the trunk of his car. If he was going to Car-can memory erase Mickey he had to appear just the normal old Donald Duck.

”Have you been involved in this kinda stuff for long?” Mickey asked finally.

Donald shrugged. ”I keep busy.”

Mickey patted his shoulder. ”Don't worry buddy I will keep this a secret.”

Donald looked him to the eye.

”I know you will.”

He thought back to the Car-can in his pocket. It would be easy...

But no.

”So, are you planning to wipe his memory?”

Donald turned around to face the tall hairy creature. ”No!”

Mickey gave him a look.

”I did maybe think of it,” Donald admitted. “-but I decided... Maybe not.”

Donald eyed the tall man. ”Anyway, I don't think we have been introduced. Are you related to that Archeologist guy Mickey hangs out with sometimes?”

”The name's Pipwolf.” He offered a hand.

Donald shook it.

”I'm a werewolf.” He tapped his nose. “That's how I helped Mickey here track you down. Scent. I was looking into this missing portal painting stuff and asked for my good friend Mickey for help.”

“The only lead he had was this Fantomius guy who had likely stolen the painting from the previous owner,” Mickey said. “And Duck Avenger who Pipwolf suspected was a rogue occupant from the Land of the Impossible. He asked my help in tracking him down and some research pointed me to his 'best friend'”

Donald nodded. “Me.”

Something dawned on him. “So you didn't run into me in Duckburg by accident?”

“No,” Mickey admitted.

Pipwolf sighed. ”This will be such a mess. I want to give Manny my report and then head off as far away as possible. I mean, she likes her bureaucracy... Two unaccompanied guests? Who have been loose in the Land of the Impossible for decades?”

”Poor guys,” Mickey said. ”You don't know the kinds of creatures there are, Donald. Two unprepared people? I fear they didn't stand a ghost of a chance.”

”I wouldn't be too sure of it,” Donald grinned.

Mickey gave him a look. ”Maybe you're right. And yes. Maybe you do know what it's like...”

Pipwolf clapped his hands. ”Anyway! I will head off. And no it's not just because I want to avoid Manny. I have a real reason. I need to check up on a Guest. He keeps wandering off. Nice duck though.”

And then, before Donald had time to ask more questions, he was gone.

”Let me guess, Pipwolf headed off before I could ask him to explain what was going on.”

Both Mickey and Donald turned to face the speaker.

She turned out to be an albino mouse.

Accompanied by Katrina Kolik and The Head of TNT.

Donald quickly saluted.

”At ease, Agent,” Katrina said. ”I want you to meet Manny. She is something of a colleague.”

”Oh?”

The albino mouse nodded. ”Even in our world, the Land of the Impossible, there needs to be rules. And people who enforce them and take care of...” She eyed Donald. ”Problems.”

Donald gave her his most innocent look.

”He won't be a problem,” Mickey said.

”We will vouch for him,” Katrina stated briskly.

Manny reached out her hand. “The painting.”

Donald looked at Katrina.

She nodded. “It's her jurisdiction. Better give it to her.”

Donald did so. Manny examined the painting.

“Ah yes. Just like I thought. It's a stable two-way portal. It seems some creatures wandered to the other end in my world and activated the portal.”

“Something tried to get through,” Mickey said. “Luckily it was too big to fit.”

“I see. By the way,” Manny turned to face Mickey. “How did you find this so fast?”

Mickey shrugged. “Donald here had a hunch.”

“Good job, Agent Duck,” Katrina said. “Although I wonder how exactly. I could swear that was classified information.”

“Uh. I was lucky?” He couldn't help adding: “I did sort of hear you thought I was unreliable.”

The Head of TNT looked embarrassed. “Maybe we jumped into conclusions. We got a tip from our contact in the Land of the Impossible here.”

“Perhaps I could have been more specific,” Manny admitted. “Our two organizations tend to avoid stepping on each other's toes. I didn't give out much information since I figured it was none of your business. I told them Mickey had a connection to us and that was all they needed to know.”

“Well, no harm done, eh?” Donald said. “You really should talk more. Communicate.”

Mickey patted his shoulder. “You're right. For starters, you might want to start by telling me what this whole TNT thing is.”

The Head turned to him. “TNT or the Tamers of Nonhuman Threats is an organization dedicated to keeping Earth safe.”

“And you're a member?” Mickey asked.

Donald nodded. “Yeah.”

He sighed. No use trying to keep things secret now. ”I guess saying I live a double life would be underselling it.”

”It's really amazing. That you can do that all. I am barely even involved with detective work and this... And I feel I'm overly stretched a lot... I don't even have custody of my nephews full-time.”

”You don't know the half of it. I have tried so hard to keep everything separate...” Donald sighed.

“That sort of a thing seems to cause more problems than anything,” The Head said. “Perhaps TNT and Manny's people should work together more. Cultivate a healthy working relationship.”

“Sounds good,” Mickey said. “Hey Donald, how about we meet up every now and then and share information?”

He saw Donald's expression. “I'm not going to drag you in into anything new. No new duties, just friendly banter between friends.

Donald wasn't all that certain. He had a suspicion this wouldn't be the last time he'd be dragged into trouble relating to this Land of the Impossible business.

But, he supposed, that was what it was like being Donald Duck.

He sighed. “That would be lovely.”


End file.
